a murder of crows
suddenly blacken the desert sky
echoing squaks
omniscent warnings
what do they imply?

is something coming?
I watch the birds fly by.

A congress of ravens
now flock above me
watchful black eyes
the ravens are wise
What is it they see?

Something is coming...
I watch the birds fly by.

A wake of vultures
approach and cirlcle overhead
the message is clear
this time it's not a sign
I am already dead

Nothing is coming.
I cannot watch the birds fly by.

My Medium (A Kyrielle)

my thoughts always clutter my mind
guilty fears that I keep confined
there is no way to displace them
poetry lets me embrace them

I brood and dwell on each dark thought
collect them til I'm overwrought
write them down and then erase them
poetry lets me embrace them

my sentiments and memories
thoughts that have plagued me like disease
I have found the strength to face them
poetry lets me embrace them

my writings best when it's painful
bless my thoughts, though they are shameful
morbid thoughts, I love to chase them
poetry lets me embrace them


Carina Fosse

The Bible in Haiku

biblical theories
explanations and morals
fictional guidance

Lake Bodom

perched on the dark waters edge
my pale reflection
rippling in Lake Bodom

it's eerie past
a reflection of my own
I see my lost teenage soul

I feel a strange connection
to the horrors of this lake
the trauma that I cannot shake

since my life was altered
I've drowned in regret
my once radiant soul now seeks death

I tell my reflection to please pull me in
Pull me to Bodom's pit, Pull me in
I belong in this ravaged lake of sin


Carina Fosse
18.10.2009

Haze

My world is blurry and surreal
but I'm way to lost to care
Dazed in this hazy fog
bloodshot vision is unclear

Choking through this smog
I try to remain cautious
Searching for fresh air
I'm sickened and I'm nauseous

Why should I even care?
to breathe fresh air once more
since I engulfed myself in this haze
I forgot what the world was like before

Before I was stuck in this smoggy daze
I never appreciated fresh air
I never really acknowledged it
It was always just there

The air, I polluted it
because I didn't care at all
This pollution can't be reversed
It will choke me until I fall

Now my cloud is ready to burst
stress built up, I'm saturated.
Toxins struggle to leak out
but are stuck in this fog that I created

The pollutants. I try to let out
but they condense around me
I can never find any air
because this smog has found me.

This polluted haze around my brain
the cloud thickens and drives me insane
when will it rain?
When will I change?

Carina Fosse
15.09.2009

He Was a Poet

He was a poet
a renaissance man to some degree
artist of spoken word,
philosopher, published novelist and emcee.

A divine inspiration
He meant the world to me

He was a character
brilliant and unique
cluttered mind, rambling thoughts
he would mumble when he would speak,

ignored and misunderstood
some saw him as a freak

He was delusional,
but he saw the world so clearly
poetic randomness,
he had a mind boggling philosophy

lost and inebriated,
he escaped from a so called reality

he was calm and tranquil
but also edgy and stressed
he was joyful,
but looking back, he may have been depressed

he'd pop an upper, down a downer
anything to fix his deep unrest

uncertain,
I must believe that he chose his death
he is missed,
much more than I ever could have guessed

he was my first love
and to have loved him I am blessed



Carina Fosse
-08-05-2009-

My So Called Life

if I decide to live
I must do it right
I have got to stop screwing up
my so called life

I've got to create goals
and make a change for the better
instead of living life
like it's already over

Carina Fosse

The Day That I Knew That War Was Real

The day that I knew that war was real
was a day I will never forget
aired lived on international television
2,993 deaths
murdered by our own weapons
commercial airliner jets

The day that I knew that war was real
was the day that it hit home
The day that I knew that war was real
was the day we were the target


Carina Fosse

My Truth

I always speak my truth,
I have never lied!
share too much about myself
just to prove
that I have nothing to hide

but the truth can bend,
warp and divide
I convince myself it's true
so, it is now my truth,
it is now my pride

the truth is what I cannot face
the truth is best denied
the truth is best forgotten
for my own sake
the truth is what I hide

when my truth is spoken
the truth may be implied
my truth is released
well the truth lingers and resides

the truth
is bona fide
my truth
keeps me alive



__Carina Fosse___
---01.09.2009---

My Demons

a hedonic thrill
devoted to desire
this demonic will
will soon transpire

blackened soul
disturbed mind
no control
trapped and entwined

how long will it hide?

My Dying Bride (inspiration from my favorite bands)

It Lies Beneath, buried inside and waiting to Unearth
She's Spawn from this Cradle of Filth and has been Enslaved since birth
she is a Lamb of God with a luminous beauty like Norma Jean
but when Shadows Fall, she's Sick of it All and her Poison will not go unseen

A Life Once Lost, her Hollow spirit is lost in Mayhem
Disturbed and obsessed, she awaits her chance to kill HIM
a Slayer at heart, Underoath she swears revenge on her Sworn Enemy
God Forbid that her Arch Enemy lives, because dead he may as well be

She has Poisoned the Well and dropped him in the lake of the Children of Bodom
hung by a Slipknot, Torched and In Flames, his Dark Funeral will be chosen
My Dying Bride is evil inside and stirs in her own Kingdom of Sorrow
after Blood Has Been Shed, she regains Fuel and awaits The Scars of Tomorrow

from Autumn to Ashes, time slowly passes, but her Cold heart still stirs
after 10 years then August Burns Red the moment IT occurs
that moment in August that she chose her victim and It Dies Today
the Torch in her eye, Everytime I Die I realize that I am her prey

As I Lay Dying in Pain with my open soul Bleeding Through
I catch a Sublime glimpse of her smile and understand that she chose me too
she is already dead, she is my dark ArkAngel sent to me from above
my gothic beauty, My Dying Bride and I shall Rise Against and be eternally in love


Carina Fosse11-03-09

Unconfused

I may not know who I am
but everyone else does
I love who ever I am
so please don't judge

you claim to know
people just like me
you stereo type
and choose to spite me

you don't know me at all
or care to find out
I think I have found myself
so don't make me have doubt

I am who I am
nothing more to figure out
but if you absolutly must know
I'll spit it right out

I am not in the closet!
and I'm not undecided!
I love people for people,
should I have to hide it?

I am not just confused.
I am just me!

Carina F**king Fosse

Beached

this is the life
the scene, the trends
following the stream
play hard until it ends

drifting with the tide
crashing like a wave
washed up and beaten
I am nothing to save

No Chance

there is no love
no dream
no chance for us to suceed

there is no oasis,
no waterfalls
no sparkly palm trees

there is no hope
no future
no you and no me

Conformity?

"Conformity?"

The cynics have doubt
in the good in humanity.
They are virtuous through self-control
and avoid the worlds vanity.

Skeptics just disbelieve
that predetermined knowledge is real.
Doubt political structure
and mass media appeal.

The dumb always follow
predetermined to be blind.
Never bother to question
or use their own mind.

Since we all do live
in a premeditated bureaucracy,
Do we use, understand
and practice democracy.

The freedoms we have,
the dumb just abuse.
The skeptics ands cynics
don't bother to use.

If the cynics dont react,
they remain pesismistic.
The skeptics have no answer
and remain a statistic.

Cynicalism and skeptism
can turn you numb.
Let the system mistreat you,
then your just like the dumb.

Stuck on the bottom,
trampled by a hierarchy of capitalists.
Since we are all not blind,
how can we let this exsist?

WHERE ARE ALL THE REBELS!
the renegades who won't conform?
Those on top of the structure,
will never change or transform.

Stuck on the bottom we stay.
Let the poor stay poor.
Let the dumb lead us away.
We all are blind in some way.



**Carina Fosse

Tarantella

infectious anguish
embedded
through my veins
spreaded

streamlined poison
onslaught
unbearable burden
overwrought

venomous demon
inserted
innocent, corrupt
converted

infectious truth
ignored
engulfed, exhausted
absorbed

siphoned emotion
drained
dizzy dance
restrained

rythmic spirit
illusion
keep on dancing
conclusion

twirling tarantella
so pure
upbeat anti-venom,
the cure

Carina Fosse


If this makes sense to anyone let me know...

May-Be

May-be

Now that the love is gone
now that we've done so much wrong
now that we can't get along
now we just seem to carry on.
I don't really know
what the hell I saw in you,
actually, I do know...
but, I doubted that it was true.

My friends saw you differently
no one could see what you may-be
but may-be,
may-not-be good enough for me.

We did have so much fun,
it really was one hell of a run
our harmony, our passion, our drive
is not dead, but it may-be done.

My friends may-be right
it may-not-be real
because I seem to love you less
when your out of sight.

I know that our love was blind
I know we can't rewind
I know that we shouldn't even try
but by my nature, I feel inclined.

I am rather happy not loving you
settling with my doubts
as truths
but, there still may-be something special about you.

Yes, it's definitely over
I need this to be done
but, I can't give you the cold shoulder
or let you feel like you have won.

I will not embrace you
I will never try to disgrace you
Though my mind will hopefully displace you
but, my heart will never erase you.

So, If you ever look behind,
keep in mind that a friend like me
may-be hard to find.

I'm here for you, if you need
I truly want you to succeed
and I do hope
someday,
you may-be what I need

for you,
your son
and for me

..........may-be


Carina Fosse

Orphan

If god is my father then I am an orphan.

If god is my weapon, god has no ammo.

If god is life, I'm in a coffin.

If god is my shelter, I go homeless.

If god is my power, I have a short circuit.

If god is hope, I am hopeless.

If christ seeks you, He can't see me.

If in your prayers he speaks to you.

He's dead silent with me.

If God is dead, then he was never there.

If God was real,

God would care.

Carina Fosse

the 7th of Febuary, 2008

Is There a Pill?

Is there a pill to make it go away?
Is there a chance the pain is here to stay?
the pain is oh so real
it's all that I can feel
Why do I want to live another day?



March 9th, 2009

Fuck DADT!

Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Don't Be, Don't Exist, Lie!
Don't share who are, just resist, Deny!
You can't openly serve for our country, Why?

Don't be open, go back in the closet!
Your not hetero enough to fight, where is the logic?
It makes no sense and it's about time we stop it.

Your too gay to protect our nation,
This is brainless discrimination.
How exactly is sexuality relevant to a military situation?

You can't be a soldier, because you're too queer.
You can't fight for our honor, choose a new career.
I can't understand it, What exactly do they fear?

That you might spread gay cooties on the other army boys?
That you'll be applying eyeliner when you batallion deploys?
That you'll misuse your guns as anal sex toys?

This is absolutly ridiculous!
Let's get rid of this.
This ignorant law is painfully ludicrous.

How many skilled technicians need to be discharged?
It's a violation of civil rights, that we have fought for so hard.
Freedom is so important, please don't disregard.

Our Army needs able troops, can't they comprehend?
Because of ignorant fears, brave Americans can't serve and defend.
Because of homophobia, our military is now weakened.

This law must be put to an end!



Carina FosseMay 12th, 2009

2007

2007


Give and take
subjected lives
The crave for war
never dies

Humans as trade
a nations investment
Misguided warfare
only fueling resentment

Excused target
Islamic Terroism
Blind devotion
a soldiers heroism

Political interference
a foreign civil war
the recurring question,
What are we fighting for?

Imposing values of corrupt politicians
only further enraging a timeless confliction

-Carina Fosse
-September 12th, 2007

Foreclosure

As Wall Street crashes
Main Street is left in ashes

Burning homes
that the bank now owns
no hope for loans

Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac
corruption
with government back

Near Trillion dollar bailout plans
to aid investors
and those in foreign lands

The American consumer needs to spend
ease their fear of the crisis at hand

Too little, too late
a topic for debate
We didn't have time to wait.

-Carina Fosse-
-10-10-2008-

There is No Oasis

blurry and surreal,

but way to lost to care

dazed in this hazy fog

my vision unclear

hoping to get through this smog

I'm sickened and I'm nautious

but there is no fresh air

sweltering sun,

heat stroke and psychosis

crawling in the dessert sands

famished and desperate

salvation is out of my hands

drained, dry and dehyrdrated

there is no oasis

there is no air

no possibilty

no chance for me to breathe

there is no oasis,

no waterfalls

no sparkly palm trees

there is no hope

there is no need for me to care

I'll never know the truth

because, there is no air

there is no going back

there are no new places

there are no more options

and there is no oasis

-Carina Fosse-

26.02.09

Cliche Happy Poem

embrace every morning

appreciate every day

try to ensure

that every day can be this way

live life by the moment

ponder every thought

let yourself go...

just don't get caught

be yourself

be a friend

always try to do good

because it will come back to you

in the end

live life to the fullest,

life is about giving

appreciate the little things

because it's the little things in life

that make it worth living

Carina Fosse

261008

Internet Infiltration

Internet technology is to agressive
mind polluting, controlling
dominating and paroling
obsessive

It can make you crazy and disturbed
leave you in agitated confusion
like a hallucinogen
perturbed

It is a dangerous linking of information
empowering thieves, burning feeds
cookies and seeds
infiltration

Haze

The polluted haze around my brain
the cloud thickens and drives me insane
when will it rain?
When will I change?

Fuck Me If I'm Wrong

Fuck the world and it's thick fog of ignorance!

Fuck stupid people who have no tolerance.

Fuck hatred and fuck greed!

Fuck everyone who can't see

that diversity is what we need.

Fuck everybody that is stuck on their cloud.

Fuck people who fear change because they're too proud.

Fuck genocide and fuck religious war.

Fuck all those who think they know

what we are fighting for.

Fuck the homophobic and fuck all the racists.

Fuck airport security for "profiling" terroists.

Fuck people who claim to be accepting.

Fuck the people who look in the other direction.

Fuck religious leaders and fuck politicians.

Fuck muslim extremists and trigger happy christians.

Fuck the chosens ones who call themselves the elite.

Fuck all religious activists

who don't practice what they preach.

Fuck anybody who is offended by this.

Fuck you all,

because without eachother we couldn't exsist.

Fuck it all, we have to get along!

and you know what...

Fuck me if I'm wrong!

--Carina Fosse--

-24-02-09-

I'm not a Butterfly, If I've Never Flown

Nourished and protected, safe external womb
In my cocoon, I will not sprout my own wings
If I don't learn to fly, here will be my tomb

Bound like a marionette, captured by strings
Under their control, these wires imprison me
Tied to these ropes, I can't experience things

I need to crack open my shell and break free
Break out of this egg, see the world on my own
Escape before there is no world left to see

I'm only a puppet, I can't stand alone
I'm not an eagle, if I stay in my nest
I'm not a butterfly, If I've never flown

Carina Fosse

17.04.09

Epistemology, Simply

what you believe, what you know to be true

knowledge is beliefs and truths, justified

it can not be knowledge if it can be denied

true knowledge can never be taught to you

Carina Fosse

-11-09-2009-

Stones

I know not to burn bridges,

but I still seem to clutter my paths

I know how to put out the fires,

but I'll get stuck, knee deep in ash

Every mountain I climb

is just another stone

blocking my path

my path back home

Every bump I hit

I'll bring it along

Every rock I carry

makes me strong

I pick up every pebble

every stone, every boulder

I just keep adding to the weight

the weight on my shoulders

every rock I pick up

keeps weighing me down

But I'll never let them go

even if they make me drown

My collection of stones,

my past , my story

my tradegies and triumphs

my sadness, my glory

I'm attached to my stones

I treasure my collection

what every stone represents

I have no recollection

my stones are a part of me

I cannot deny

I'll carry these stones

until the day I die

---Carina Fosse---

12.10.2008

I Want It All

I WANT IT ALL



I got something
but it's not enough
I get nothing
but a tease and a touch

I don't want everything
I wan't it all
I ask for nothing
but I feel it call

I feel passion
I feel lust
but this strange desire
I most definitely can't trust

Inspired, yet
sickened by my thoughts
wanting to come out
but don't wanna get caught

Desire so strong
provoking my fears
erotic and wrong?
I've wanted it for years

Maybe I'm all messed up
maybe I need to feel alive
maybe all my desires
don't need to collide

Offer it to me
Don't make me decide
as strong as it is
I still haven't tried




Carina Fosse
August, 2000

A True Leader (Barack Obama)

he speaks with such certainty of a vision so clear

he has a dream and like Martin,

he knows how to get there

he radiates hope that a change is gonna come

he has a plan and give us all hope

that we have needed for so long

we shall overcome, we shall win this race

we will hear the sweet sound

the sweet sound of amazing grace

this new grassroots movement has stretched across this earth

so many people, with so many reasons

all pray for a political rebirth

he's a modern day hero and he is a true leader

he reaches out to everyone

from the homeless to the blog readers

he took us from muddy waters to mountains high

crossed valleys deep and rivers wide

change can happen, if we try

from the roots, through all the struggles and all the grief

from the civil rights movement

to a black Commander in Chief

the world is changing, he is proving it to us

he is now sworn into presidency in god we trust

he is making history and brings us hope from fear

whatever happens down the road, remember that we have made it here

Swing low sweet chariot because change has come

We have gathered and we have won!

but at the same time change has just begun

Change is gonna come

Change can happen

and Change has begun

carina fosse

21-03-09

GET OUT

Your out of my life
But still on my mind
Your this empty feeling
That will hopefully go away with time
This churning feeling at the bottom of my gut
An itchy scab formed from a tiny cut
Your out of sight
But your still all I see
Worrying about you
Still keeps me in misery
I want you out of my aching head
I’m sick of wondering if your dead

Get Out of my skull
Get Out of my mind
Get Out of my heart
Or get back in my life

I cannot be with you
I wouldn’t survive
I don’t want to see you
I just want to know that your alive
I’m sick of not knowing where you are
Except unreachable and incredibly far
Your driving me insane
You still cause me pain
When will this change?
Will you ever get out of my fucking brain?
Your constant tapping at my bone
We haven’t spoken,
but please leave me alone!

Get Out of my skull
Get Out of my mind
Get out of my heart
Or get back in my life






---> Carina Fosse

Pantoum of an Orchid

sprawling like an orchids roots
stretching for morning air
enlightened with the sunshine
a blossomed red lotus

stretching for the morning air
emerging from the water
a blossomed red lotus
revitalized and refreshed

emerging from the water
mind and soul cleansed
revitalized and refreshed
clarity is understanding

mind and soul cleansed
seeking true nirvana
clarity is understanding
steering the wheel of Dharma

seeking true nirvana
underneath the Bodhi Tree
steering the wheel of Dharma
my truth empowers me

underneath the Bodhi Tree
I ponder my truth and fantasy
my truth empowers me
I walk the path chosen for me

I ponder my truth and fantasy
I am understanding my destiny
I walk the path chosen for me
I am on an envigorating high

I am understanding my destiny
reaching for air to blossom
I am on an envigorating high
the true nature of phenomena

reaching for air to blossom
sprawling like an orchids roots
the true nature of phenomena
enlighted with the sunshine


------>Carina Fosse<------
----30-03-09----

The Blast

I crawled through withered ash

your charred corpse lies in the past

beneath the ashes

as the fire passes

buried under residue from the Blast

digging out from the wreck

the stench of burning flesh

impossible conditions

a hopeless mission

I’m scrambling through this mess

a nuclear genocide

fighting for mankind

I left you to die

so I could survive

How could I ever leave you behind?

--->Carina Fosse<---

-26-03-09-

Our World Our Hate

Our World, Our Hate

A small amount of hate lies inside us all.

This hate can dwell, consume and divide us all.

You may not show it, hate is not always something you share.

Discomfort, judgement, pride and prejudice are all because of fear.

Please, Stop passing this fear to our children. Remember this hate has been taught.

It was passed down from generations of neighbors that have fought.

Hate has seperated us, slaughtered us and enslaved us.

We hate for of our god, because Satan has craved us.

Hate breeds, plagues, lingers and remains.

Hate is only passed on, so we must make a change.

Change isn't just gonna come, we have to make it happen.

Break this murderous cycle and put down our weapon.

It's a tremendous challenge to stop all the wars caused by hate,

but we can make a change, we do choose our world's fate.

Teach our children that we are all different, special and unique.

Take notice of our judgements and watch how we speak.

Embrace our cultures, our foods and our arts.

Open our minds, taste the fruits of our world and open our hearts.

If we could understand our differences and agree to disagree.

Imagine how much better our world would be.

------>Carina Fosse<------

-- March 17th, 2009 --

Smothering the Flame

Raging flames to wilted ash

That inferno could never last

Molten lava to stone cold rock

The fire in your eyes is now just dark

Our fire once burned with fury, rage and lust

Our burning passion is now dry as dust

You became too engulfed in the flame between us

But just like fire needs oxygen, we needed trust

You can’t control a fire

and it’s too hard to tame

So you suffocated me

just like the flame

In your attempts to keep this blaze alive

You just put it out with all your lies

That glorious flame that sparked our fire

The emotion, the passion and the sizzling desire

You tried to protect it, but you tried too hard

Now we’re both burnt out, scorched and charred

You did all you could to save the fire we shared

But you were smothering the flame, it had no air

You cant control a fire

and it's to hard to tame

So you suffocated me

just like the flame

The fire weakened

with every tear that I cried

Slowly extinguishing the flame,

until the fire died

well... we tried

Carina Fosse

26.03.09

Armor

I can see through you
see through your lies
you put on so much armor
but it's no disguise
your secrets are buried under your flesh
to dig them up is your last wish
you never ask for pity
yet you shame yourself
ashamed of yourself
you never ask for help
the pain inside lingers like purgatory
unsettled and unresolved
an untold story

--Carina Fosse--

Across This Vast Ocean Pt. 1

Across this vast ocean, my spirit is being snatched.
I've floated away, so alone and detached.

I've crossed this ocean in an effort to move foward.
Yeah, I'm on a path, but what's that path headed toward?

Uncertainty has led me here and uncertainty draws me back.
My will keeps me here and it's to late to retract.

There is an ocean between us cluttered with wreckage.
I tell you we can cross it but you never get the message.

This ocean is tremendous and I'm on the other side.
Crossing it may seem impossible, if you've never tried.




Carina Fosse
10102007

Across this Vast Ocean pt. 2

Across this vast ocean, my spirit has been snatched.
I've floated far away, so alone and detached.

I gaze across this ocean for a glimpse of reality now lost.
My hope is shattered and this is the cost.

Saying goobye was brutal, your face was so final.
Everything was so unsettled and I left in denial.

Your blame and my guilt sinks us in this ocean.
The weight and the burden anchors me from motion.

The ocean between us becomes ever more vast.
The magic between us has become the past.

In this vast ocean hope drifts away.
In this vast ocean our love is astray.

There is something greater than this vast ocean standing in our way.
So, across this vast ocean, I will stay.





Carina Fosse
10102007

my world far away

All life's little things
always missing out on them
every happening

the births of children
the weddings unattended
funerals of friends

my world far away
an ocean between my life
where ever I stay



----> Carina Fosse

HEROIN!

Heroin...
why do you exist?
Heroin...
why can't people resist
the bitter sweet taste of your poison.
Your a morbid curse that nobody would have chosen.


Heroin...
your like a vampires bite,
spreading evil through their veins
rushing inside, but still as night.
You torment minds, making them deranged,
but without you, they become estranged.

Your power, your fury.
Their weakness, their purity.

Dirty spike, disgusting truth,
troubled souls, innocent youth.

Heroin...
I'm enraged by your sins.
Your an intricate game
that nobody can win.

Zombifying those I know
and luring them to your potent flow.

Heroin...
why do people crave your rabid injection?
Heroin...
why do people glorify your lethal infection?

Heroin...
Why did you take him from me?
Heroin...
why do you create such misery?

Heroin...
like Satan you claimed his soul!
Heroin...
You possesed him, you took control!


Heroin...
you took it all, until there was nothing left!
Heroin...
You even took his last gasping breath!

SMACK!

You are death!





---------------->> Carina Fosse

Polluted

fragile and frail

but eager to stray

better to have a good time

and be in harms way

misjudgement of character

or attraction to swine

was it decision

or weakness to decline

hazed perception

polluted mind

outnumbered

weak and confined

unutterable actions

guilt unjustified

unsettled disgust

socially denied

plagued by scathe

pained to remind

irremovable dirt

fear redefined

burden of filth

permeable grime

penetrated by

an altering crime

Carina Fosse